Eastbound and Down

Two things that make a great comedy are excessive use of foul language and characters that abuse drugs. HBO's new comedy series "Eastbound and Down" does a wonderful job of blending these things together resulting in comedic gold.

E&D stars Danny McBride who stole the show in his few scenes in Pineapple Express as well as Tropic Thunder and is destined for greatness. His delivery is genius and reminds me of Will Ferrell who is actually a producer of the show as well as appearing in the 2nd episode.

The gist of the show is a washed up major league pitcher who left the league in disgrace after using steroids as well as being openly racist and generally belligerent. That is just the backdrop though, what we get to experience is some of the funniest and most in your face comedy ever recorded.

There are so many quotes I could post here that made me piss my panties but instead I'll just put up the entire first episode. Enjoy.

Oh wait, I will post one solid quote, "I'm the man who has the ball, I'm the man that can throw it faster than fuck so that is why I'm better than everyone in the world, kiss my ass and suck my dick, everyone."

***UPDATE***

I had the entire pilot episode here but it was taken down for copyright reasons which sucks because it is IMHO the greatest pilot episode of a comedy show ever!!!

American Idol

George Ramirez is why I watch American Idol. I don't watch this show to see who can sing the best. Once the tryouts are over the show sucks azzz. I watch it to see the socially awkward, mentally challenged and hilariously hilarious. Mostly I watch because it makes me feel so normal.

And so here is George Ramirez who is certainly the most awesome contestant in recent memory. All George wants in life is a house with nice floors.





"Ooooh look, no ticket"

Bigger is better

The University of Alabama recently approved plans to expand Bryant-Denny stadium in the South end zone. When completed the stadium will hold over 101,000 peoples which will rank 5th in the NCAA.

Despite being 5th in overall size, it will be #1 in the totally awesome rankings.

Here is why...

The 4 stadiums larger that Bama's will be:

1)Penn State's Beaver Stadium 107,000.
This place looks like someone threw up on the construction blue prints and nobody ever noticed. The seats are in all the wrong places, addition here, skyboxes over there, "lets put a double decker over here in the corner". Yuck.

2)Michigan's Stadium 106,000.
The original "superstadium" would be #1 in the totally awesome rankings if it were 1956. Its pretty insane that this place held over 100,000 back then and its hard not to respect the big house. However, this place is so flat that the noise escapes too easily and the spectators in the back are 3.4 miles from the field.

3)Ohio State's Horseshoe 102,000.
What a dump. There is almost nothing about Ohio State that I like and this piece of dog crap is certainly no exception. I don't feel like this cement trap deserves the energy needed to make anymore keystrokes....

4) Tennessee's Neyland Stadium-102,000
I actually like this place despite the fact that it should only hold 85,000. They shrunk their seats sizes so that even Nicole Richie would feel cramped. This doesn't jibe well with Tennessee's obesity rankings but oh well. This place is loud, very loud. Lots and lots of hillbillies decked out in their hunting orange screaming for the Vols. This place would rank #2 in the totally awesome poll if I bothered to go past #1 which I didn't.



The new and improved Brant-Denny will be even louder and more beautifuller than it is today and its pretty damn loud and beautiful now. It will be completed for the start of the 2010 season.

How to lose $800,000

Phil Ivey, a well known poker player and notorious big bet gambler, made a couple of large bets on the 2009 Superbowl last week totaling $1.6 Million. He bet the Cardinals for $800,000 which at +7 covered easily but his halftime bet will go down as one of the sickest gambling stories ever.

Ivey took the Cardinals in the first half at +3.5 for another $800,000. Anyone watching the game knows the rest of this story but for anyone who didn't watch let me recap. With less than 20 seconds left in the half and a score of 10-7 Steelers, the Cardinals were on the 5 yard line about to score at least a fieldgoal. The only way Ivey looses his massive bet is if Kurt Warner throws an interception and the Steelers return it 100 yards for a touchdown.

Oooops.


I don't know how to caption a photo yet but if I could in this pic Phil would be saying, "Kurt Warner did whaaaaaaaaat?"

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